At the very least, I knew it would make for an interesting blog post…

So there’s this website called Fiverr that is a marketplace for $5 services. I was browsing it the other day and saw that a lady would read tarot cards for me for $5. That was just too good to pass up, so I paid the $5.

When I woke up this morning, my reading was complete and ready for me to check out. It’s spectacularly inaccurate and inapplicable. Below in quotes are some of the more interesting points.

Card 1 deals with what’s happening now, and was the “6 of Wands reversed”:

“This card is saying that going one right now is that you may be facing or having problems with a big decision.”

Nope. I actually don’t have any big decisions in the immediate future. I’ve got a path that I’m following, and I’ve already made the big decisions.

Card 2 is about what’ll happen in the near future (2–4 months) and was the “5 of Cups reversed”:

“This card is a card of worries and anxieties. It shows that you may be facing some problems that will be causing you some problems which will make you nervous and worry.”

Facing problems that will cause me problems? Hmmm… Well, I guess I can’t really comment on that because unlike the card reader, I can’t see into the future. But in general I’m not really a worrier. And actually, in the next 2-4 months I’m doing a lot of traveling and I feel really good about it.

I won’t go through every other card and it’s meaning, but here are some more highlights:

“Wheel of Fortune is a warning against gambeling and tells you that you really need to be careful when spending money on things like this. do not go overboard on lottery tickets or spending sprees where the money is being gambled. just over all be careful.”

I’ve never gambled or bought a lottery ticket in my life, and have zero desire to. But I guess it’s always nice to get more council like this, right?

“Luck ~ 4 of Wands reversed ~ luck isnt on your side right now. This card is telling you to be careful when it comes to things like signing contracts.”

I’m not in any business or anything where I would ever sign a contract. I’ve signed one contract in the past 4 years. I won’t be getting a gym membership or renewing my phone contract any time soon.

“~ The Pope reversed ~  This is a time to play by the rules and to use down-to-earth, normal, traditional ways to handle your money. Gambling is not likely to pay off now in any form. Seek the advice of bankers and professional money managers or people with more experience dealing with money than you have.”

Again with the gambling, huh? While I DO love me some Kindle poker, I still have never gambled. I am very frugal and conservative with my money.

Well… On second thought, maybe I SHOULD cut back on my Fiverr spending…